FIRST!

As you can tell by the hilarious play on words I used in the domain name for my “blog,” I’m a really funny guy.

A blog bitching about commercials in the age of DVRs and ad-blockers is like bitching about having to separate the cream from the milk when the Milkman makes his weekly delivery… but… I don’t really have a rebuttal to that, I just hate commercials.

My name is Conz… nope, that’s not really my name, and there is literally no reason for me to use a nick name, but screw it. I’m Conz, and this is my “blog” where I rant and rave about completely avoidable things.

A little about me – I’m an aspiring writer.  At least that’s what I tell people, as it sounds better than “I’m nothing.”  As you’ll see from the numerous grammatical errors that follow I should really aspire to be something else. If I had to describe my writing style, I’d call it “diagnosable.”

Clearly I watch a ton of TV. That’s where I absorb all this delicious uselss knowledge.  Ask me how to do basic division, and I’ll look at you like you have 2 heads.  Ask me who starred in that McDonalds McNuggets campaign in ’03, and I probably won’t look at you again… you’re pretty damn ugly.

I have no background in advertising… I have no background in anything… go ahead, look me up, nothing. I’m a ghost.  (Don’t look me up, creep.)  I don’t even really understand how advertising works, but ignorance is bliss. I’m sure just by me talking about commercials, advertisers are doing their job and I’m the asshole. I know what you’re probably saying right now… “You think you can do a better job?!”  Yup… but then again I also “think” I have a future.  I “think” I’m funny and handsome, and I can nail every attractive girl I see…

So heed my warning, if you can’t stand uneducated vocabularies and hyperbole (How’s that for a 7th grade vocab word?  I know what hyperbole is… I think) then you should probably just continue on to the “tube” site you were planning on “browsing” now.

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